The "New One"
Anymore it’s hard to develop a meaningful relationship with anyone. Hell, even become friends. Because we all come with baggage anymore. Well to be fair I shouldn't say all. Some of us do really well at leaving a relationship with no ties.
But back to the point.
With some people, baggage comes nicely packaged with emotions. Emotions are things I can handle. They're simple and have roots that can be pulled, much like weeds. The baggage I'm speaking of is that comes in the form of people.
We all have a past, despite if we admit to it or not. Now I have give it up to the people who will fully admit to those people in their past, but they need to do a better job at ending the relationships with those people.
I guess what I'm saying is you can't be “just friends” afterward. You can be civil but not “friends”.
Because friends, like boyfriends or girlfriends, are protective, and “friends” who use to be boy/girlfriends, take the cake in this fucked up semi sudo-relationship game.
Mainly because most of them refuse to grow up, and move on. They can give off the appearance of moving on but somewhere on the inside, they still hold on to that old flame.
In a way I feel sorry for those people, because I know a good 3 to 5 years of their life, that they could be spending productively is about to go down the drain. Unless they get who they want back.
But call me selfish. Who I feel sorry for, in this game, is the new man or woman trying to enter the life of the person who brings that type of baggage. They're never going to get a fair chance, because they don't want to be that douche bag who says you shouldn't still be hanging out with that guy. They can’t say that, because it comes off as being controlling. That’s a bad thing to be perceived as being, when you’re trying to start something with someone.
Those who are put in the situation of being the "new one" have yet to establish themselves in that person’s life enough to say something like that and it not be taken as controlling. The best they can do is hint at the fact.
Meanwhile that just "friend" is left free to make the "new guys" life a living hell, until the “new one” basically has no choice, but to give it up.
Social Networking only makes this worst. It gives the “friend" access to the “new ones” personal life and opens them for a direct attack. Facebook gives out their email and phone number to this psycho "friend".
Granted they can make their profile private. But it’s all too easy to make another profile pretending to be someone else to get around that private setting or that block button.
Everyone who knows me personally or is a fan/reader of my work knows I write from experience. So the answer to the question is........ Yes.
So to round this out and end my rant.
We as adults need to do better at ending relationships. This we're "just friends now" term has to end. It has to. You can't date, end it and be "just friends". Period. Saying that is like leaving a safety net there. So when the "new guy" finally gives up, you have something to fall back to.
So ends my social suicide for the night. Damage control for me the "new guy" starts with a new phone number tomorrow and a lot of explaining on why this was put on Twitter. I wonder if “You didn’t take the hint.” Is a good excuse.
Fuck Nickelback
I wonder why certain things catch on. We've all done it, stopped to look at something that's popular, and tried to figure out why. We're all mindless drones led by whatever pop culture computer program is run that day.
Music seems to be one of the best indicators. I won't go on about the girlie pop music, but more recently there has been a string of really bad, uninspired cookie cutter rock. It's like people don't look past the surface anymore. I check out the music of everyone that’s suggested to me to make sure they fit my eclectic style. Nickelback is one of those that are always put on the list and this is completely lost on me. The more I reject them the more hits they get and the more they are marketed to me.
Don't get me wrong. I don't want you to think I'm judging you. I did like that one Nickelback song; they just unfortunately seem to keep playing it over and over and just calling it by a new name.
I guess for me it just helps when a band has great music, a great vocalist, great lyrics and a great style. There are exceptions I suppose. I don't like the lead singer for Anchors, but they are sonically stimulating. A friend introduced me to a band called Capa to the Sun recently that absolutely rocks, but they have lyrical content that doesn’t even rival a pot head.
I had a point here, oh yeah, Nickelback sucks. I have a list of things to do before I die, and listed right below "sleeping with all girls from Atomic Blonde" is "kick Chad Krueger in the nuts.”
It seems like nobody takes the time to figure out what really moves them. They just take a look at what other people dig and claim it as their own.
Kind of explains the explosion of teenagers wearing vintage rock t-shirts. I was at a show a few weeks ago and an 18 year old girl was there wearing a Ramones shirt. I asked her if she sported the shirt because she thought it was cool or because she liked the band. Her response, “They're a band!?" God I wish I was making that up.
I'm just saying that there's a lot of crap out there. The next time someone introduces you to something that sucks, call them on it, because people latch on to this stuff and pass it around like a malt liquor at Biggie's wake.
