The Whole Truth, and Nothing But
Being truthful is a characteristic that we look for our friends and potential partners to embody; in fact to encounter dishonesty is a deal breaker for many relationships. How honest do you really want your friend or your boyfriend/girlfriend to be with you? Can you e too honest with people?
Iím not going to say that I donít or havenít lied, because that would e a lie in itself. What I hear from my friends and most recently from the man that I am dating, that I can be a little brutal with my comments. I guess that is true, to an extent, but I have my reasons.
Beating around the bush is for the inexperienced virgin boy not for me. I have wished to hear some really brutal truth from previous lovers in the past when I felt like I was getting a pity answer or they were leaving something to spare my feelings. I have always hated that. Like a Band-Aid, I just want it ripped off so the healing can begin. Hereís some examples.
If a man decides to quit seeing me and wants to give me and reason, let it be a real one. But donít take the time to do it then waste our time it by lying. If itís because Iím too heavy, or my teeth arenít white enough, maybe he lost respect for me by sleeping with him on the first date; thatís all fine to hear, because it gives me the chance to change things if I choose, but at least Iím not racking my brain trying to figure out what I did later on.
Your best friend is in a relationship that lacks romance and intimacy, so she looks elsewhere to fill that void, and quickly becomes attached. She asks you what she should do. If your gut is telling you one thing and your head another, go with the gut. If you feel like she should go for it, but back off the love stuff some, say it; but if you donít feel that way, donít tell her what she wants to hear, be her friend tell her the truth.
Next time your friend tries on a hideous shirt, donít let her go out looking like a fool, tell her itís ugly. If your mate isnít quite doing things as you like, let them know. To withhold your true feelings isnít honest and that leaves a part of yourself you are not giving the other person, give them a 100% of yourself. Say how you really feel, and feel how free the truth can really set you.
My Babies Daddies
Being the proud single mother that I am, I tend to talk a lot about my children and the struggles and successes of parenting with other mothers. Our problems are similar in what we go through day to day, but the drama with their babies daddyís is always much more exciting and confusing than mine is. I noticed something after I had my second child, when I would talk about them with someone they would ask me if they had the same father or different ones. I would tell them that they had the same father and my answer always brought a surprise look across their face. Their surprise was also mine, why is it that I have only met a handful of women in Springfield that have their children by the same man.
I took it as a coincidence, most of my friends had only one child, but the more I asked the more I found the same answers. This doesnít stop at two fathers for children; my boyfriendís ex-wife has 6 children by 4 different fathers. The youngest two are twins and their father is of Latin descent and not currently living in the states. Another woman I know has all three of her children by different men and is living with another one now, could she go 4 for 4, only time will tell.
It doesnít get any better; a woman that lived next door to my mother had a white son, a mixed son, and a then a mixed baby girl by a third man. A girl I went to high school with had a baby with one guy then ended up becoming pregnant a few years later by his uncle, and we donít even live in Arkansas. I canít even remember the last woman I met that could boast about their situation like I can.
What drives this multiple paternal figure frenzy, could it be that women in Springfield lack a screening process that requires more than proper anatomical equipment in a partner? As of 2007, females outnumbered the males by nearly 4000, which mean that the men seem to have the upper hand as far as what options they have for a partner. Maybe itís the men that get choosey and decide to plant their seed elsewhere that is causing this epidemic.
The answer isnít clear but the solution is. If the man that you are about to sleep with is a man that you would not be alright interacting with for the next 18 years, then donít let that guy get you pregnant. Women will spend more time mulling over which shoes to buy than they do which guy they go home with from the pub crawl. So to all Springfield women, make a pledge to have just one baby daddy for your children. Think of the stress reduction that comes with having only one man to argue with over visitation and child support, rather than three.